How does anything exist as crazy as popcorn?

I mean, seriously.  Think about it.  Name one other thing that has to explode before you can eat it.  I read somewhere that this property can me mostly attributed to starch and moisture, but then come on, potato, what's the deal?  Maybe a potato would just take more heat...I wonder if you could build a bomb calorimeter large enough to hold an entire potato if it would be possible to 'pop' it into a larger, fluffier version of its' former self.  Has anyone tried this? 

And speaking of bomb calorimetry, are we really convinced this is the best way to measure our food?  Is digestion really so linear and void of variety in metabolic processes that it would suffice to categorize everything based on how much heat is produced when you torch it to oblivion?  Just a thought.

Carry on.

All I need is a Foie Gras Chapeau.

...or some kind of belt fashioned out of a fruit roll-up would suffice, I suppose. I just found out (probably, oh, light-years behind everyone else) that Lady Gaga recently wore a dress made out of meat. Uh. What? Seriously? You're...serious. Aren't you.

I've decided it's actually retarded enough to be totally undeserving of any further discussion. Not even with regard to how disgusting and insulting that is (in particular, to people who can't even afford to eat it, let alone wear it.) Not even that.